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Sardarjee
Then there's the one about the Sardarji who brought his binoculars to a funeral where they were going to bury a distant relative of his...
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Once a cruise ship carrying people from all the nations was going on a 'around the world' tour when it got grounded. The ship became slow and finally came to a grinding
halt. Captain of the ship called an emergency meeting and told the passengers, " Friends, we are in trouble because of God's being angry with us. We need to give sacrifice and I need three people to sacrifice their life so that rest of us can be saved." All of them moved towards the Deck where a japnese came forward and shouted "Long live japan" and jumped into the
sea. Then a Israeli jew stepped forward said "Hellulaja" and dived into the sea.
After that no one came forward for few seconds while people stared at each other and suddenly out of nowhere a Sardarji came forward near the railing and chanted, " Jo bole-so-nihal, sat sri akaal, wahe guruji da khalsa, wahe guruji di fateh, Jai maa Kali, Jai maa Durga, Jai Hanuman, jai Sri Ram, Jai siva-sankar, Jai baba nanak di, Jai jawan jai kissan ".................... and finally yelled at the top of his voice, "Bharat mata ki jai",
And Kicked the pakistani standing next to him in the sea.
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How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
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What did the sardarji do when he noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?
He turned it over and used the other side.
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Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed!!!
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How can you recognize a surd in a submarine?
He is the one with the parachute on his back.
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A sardarji going to London on a plane, how can you steal his window seat?
Tell him the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.
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What do you do when a Sardarji throws a pin at you?
Run like Hell.... he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.
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Why does it take longer to build a Sardar snowman as opposed to a Regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.
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Sardars Hari Singh and Gani Singh are in a railway station. Hari Singh asks the clerk: "Can I take this train to Ludhiana?"
"No," answers the Railway man.
"Can I?" asks Gani Singh.
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A sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs
Start approaching he is cowering in his seat when his friend asks him
"kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinema hi to hai"
Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai Lekin voh to janwar hai, usko kya pata " .
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Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks and he Takes along some wine and chicken with him.
Somebody stops him and asks "kyon bhai ye sab kyon leke baithe ho?"
Sardarji replies "Saali train late aati hai kahin bhook se na marjaun"
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Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train.
He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived.
This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees, the sardarji deserved more service.
So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home.
Reaching home, he went to Wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror. Said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on the Train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"
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Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees and Started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is Missing ;
what are you thanking God for ?"
The sardarji replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I
wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."
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Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer space .The ground control issues commands "Rubi!" "Woof!" (its the barking sound )
"Press the red button." "Woof! Woof!" "Moti!" "Woof!" "Press the white button." "Woof! Woof!"
"Sardarji!" "Woof." "Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"
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Santa Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay.
They managed to to a double-decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom
seat, But unfortunate Banta got pushed to the top.
After a while when the rush was over, Santa went upstairs to see friend Banta Singh.
He met Banta in a bad condition clutching the seats in front with both hands, scared to death. He says, "Arre Banta Singh ! What the heck's goin' on? Why are you So scared ? I was enjoying my ride down there ?
Scared Banta replies. "Yeah, but you've got a *driver.*"
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Sardar went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to SARDARs," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned to tell the salesman "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"Damn, he recognized me," he thought. he went for a complete
disguise this time, haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before he again approached the salesman.
"I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Sardar?" "Because that's a microwave," he replied.
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